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So I hate to break it to you here folks.
But the reason only some of your goals… or more than likely none of your goals have been accomplished has nothing to do with your circumstances, nothing to do with your poor ass excuses but everything to do with you. You are getting in the way of accomplishing all of the amazing, wonderful things that you dream up while you're sleeping.
Stop feeding the world excuses as to why you are not where you want to be. It is you and it is FEAR, and that is it. Period.
You need to start taking back control of your life.
It's so easy to blame it on the kids, the spouse, the job, the limited time, the limited money, you don't have a car, you do have car...with car payments, you live at home or you don't live at home.
There's an excuse for everything, believe me, I know, I played the victim role for a couple of years after having my son. Everything was just out of reach because I was a single mom.
But, instead of wasting time thinking of the reasons why it won't work. Start using that time more wisely and be creative. Figure out a way to make it work.
Now I have no idea what's going on in your life it could be something as simple as you wanting to lose weight, wanting to spend more time with the kids, wanting to start a small business out of your home, needing to remodel the kitchen, getting caught up on the bills... Or could be things that are a lot more complicated like going through a divorce, losing a loved one, a bad breakup, your arguing with your mom and again, you got kicked out of your house and you are trying to figure out where to live. You could have just found out your boyfriend got you pregnant… and you are sitting in a Walmart stall with your panties around your ankles staring at 3 pregnancy tests… insisting that maybe you are doing it wrong… because all three tests came back with pink plus signs… and there is just no way this could be happening to you... That last one was a very personal experience, but I’m sure a few of you can relate.
Everyone has their own stuff and their own struggles. But you need to remember that no one cares about your circumstances as much as you do.
No one.
So stop sitting around on the phone with your best friends, talking in their ear off about how complicated your life is and how unfair it is to be you... and start sitting down and taking that time to come up with a plan on how to get out of your situation.
More than likely if you're not paying the person on the other side of that phone to help you out, their not helping you. I’m sorry to say, they may actually be making your situation worse by adding more fuel to your fire. You need to have less friends that are consoling you while you cry… and more friends that are reminding you, of just how strong you are, and encouraging you to just push forward. Less ‘Woe is you’ Friends… and More ‘Shut up and get back to your passion’ Friends! You don’t need a friend that agrees with all your excuses, and you certainly don’t need a friend that agrees that the world is as cold and dark as you are sometimes describing it to be. If all your friends are like that, well, you are destined to fail.
There is NO WAY OUT.
Because your entire world seems to be against you… even your friends agree!
What you need…. Is the ability to find the possibilities in your life and start finding a way out.
There is no short-term get out of jail for free card, this isn't Monopoly. It's the little tiny itty-bitty steps DAILY that will get you to where you want to be. But it's the ACTION you HAVE to ACT.
You have to MOVE.
So it's 2018. Did you write a list?
If you didn't write a list.
If you didn't write down a passion.
If you didn't write down a goal.
That is your first step right now, take out a piece of paper scribble some stuff down.
Then look at that awesome list and circle the most exceptional passion on that list, the one that gets you the most excited, the one that makes you beam, the one that makes you all giddy when you talk about it with your friends, that's the one we're going to accomplish in 2018, starting right now!
This is what we are going to do.
I’m going to talk about 4 steps
Write this stuff down.
Immediate
Within the week
Within the month
Miscellaneous things, sprinkled in (Because everyone loves sprinkles)
So this is how it works.
Number one: Immediate.
These are the things that you need to be doing daily. Stuff that you have to do, in order to survive. Like feeding the kids, Right?, you have to feed the kids or the kids will die. That’s a given. You have to take a shower, showers are imperative so you're not the smelly human at work. You have to sometimes run errands (unless you solely buy everything online or you are some sort of hermit), you have to put gas in the car, you have to vacuum your house, you have to take the dog to the vet…. You have to work… There's a lot of things that you have to do immediately in order to survive in the world. I don’t think I need to go too much more in-depth I feel as if you are a smart crowd.
Number 2: Within the week.
Now this is where it gets pretty tricky, these are the things that you need to be planning.. ahead, regarding time set aside for your newly found passion.
If you didn’t catch yesterday’s podcast, I suggest you take the time to go back… it also has some amazing content of pursuing goals. One of the things I talked about was, Time Blocking.
You need to set aside a certain amount of time each week...whether it’s once a day, once every other day, 3 times a week... where you are setting out an hour, 2 hours, 3 hours to work on your passion.
The thing that gets you excited.
There needs to be time set aside, when you can sit down. And it needs to be planned out, or something else will take it’s place.
Now you can't take away time from the wife or the husband, you can't take away time from the kids, you can't take away time from the shower.
So you're going to have to take time from someplace else. This is when you need to start analyzing your life. Where is all your REAL free time going?
You have to be honest with yourself.
Are you Netflix binging?
Are you playing poker with the guys three times a week?
Are you on too many bowling teams?
Are you spending way too much time gaming? Candy Crush?
Blabbing on the phone with your friends for hours talking about your problems, talking about their problems, talking about how much your husband sucks, talking about your kids, talking about miscellaneous things that aren't getting you anywhere closer to your goal.
You are going to have to cut this bull crap out of your life and replace it with ideas, and research and a notebook filled with a plan of attack. Your plan.
Number 3: Within the month.
Now you need to start setting small little goals, that are aligned with your big goal. For instance, by this date you're going to have lost this much weight, by this date you're going to know how to set up a website, by this date you're going to have a vendor setup for getting baking flour cheaper because you want to open a new bakery, whatever it is I don't know what it is. But what are the monthly deadlines (every month) that you have for yourself - and work towards hitting those deadlines.
Number 4: Miscellaneous things, sprinkled in.
This is the dates with your wife. This is the quality time with your kids. This is getting your hair done. These are the MUST do’s that you are required to sprinkle in to your calendar to make sure all the people in your life are getting the love and attention they need. And that also includes, pampering yourself every once in awhile. Meditation, Yoga and time to Reflect are all things that I encourage you to sprinkle all over your calendar.
So this is what I need from you. Write that list, if you have not already. Circle the passion you want to dive into… and start breaking your time line down.
You need to keep moving, and stay energized about this coming year. I feel good things happening for you, but only if you make the choice to put down all the excuses and finally set up a plan, so you can win in 2018.
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Xo- Sabrina Victoria
Do something awesome today!